the power's out. i'm smoking weed by flashlight
i wish i was dedicated to anything like you are to weed
i now understand why he chose to have sex with my friend rather then me after lookin in the mirror this morning. and id do the same thing.
Mines from giving head on hardwood floors.
legit been throwing up since 7am. told my parents the two bowls of puke in my dorm were soup
is it a bad thing if he can only get off when i start talking like one of the girls from Jersey Shore??
Dont judge me. Him and his friends got me drunk for free, the least i could do was suck his dick
I just got eleven picture messages of my dick and balls hanging out of my shorts last night. I guess it really is summer when the fratastic, man-thigh exposing shorts come out...
Bro i heard that. I've seen so many balls this month its like march madness all over again
in the middle of giving him head in the backseat of my car he taps me on the shoulder, opens the door, throws up three times and then proceeds to tell me how amazing i am.
I feel like my teeth are caked on with other teeth. What did I just smoke?
Our room will be decorated with my urine.
Please note: when a bouncer tells you to leave, pointing out that their career path makes them a much better judge what to do will not make you friends
Let me be the 15% helpful, 85% useless as shit angel on your shoulder.
Currently rolling a blunt in the bathroom of Planned Parenthood
and i thought it was paint or jizz but it was cheese
please tell me you didnt taste test that
Rich men love me! I remind them of their trophy wife!!!
Randomize
