He just said he wasn't going to drink on Saturday because he was drinking on Thursday and Friday...we need new friends.
you said you couldnt let go of the fence because your hand was molding to it.
Just think about how many life skills I lack. Cooking... Driving... Sobriety...
Dude just read our convo. Apparently I was talking to you while I was naked. She wasn't happy about it.
I legit had to pull him off my car. Then he texted me saying 'take me places.' Shotgun getting that drunk tonight
I took in his dog. My exboyfriend still calls me for 2 things, blow jobs and animal rescue. I need to end this cycle
You peed on someone's house because they had a Wisconsin flag.
When you wake up so hungover that you don't even wanna cough for fear of vomiting... It's not gunna be a good day.
Now I can't unsee my hot boss's under-boobs. Monday will be awkward.
Pics or STFU
Just assume that every drink in that house has alcohol in it.
He's getting Easter eggs filled with weed or Jell-O shots for his birthday
not sure if destroying him emotionally was worth it but damn it's a fucking hilarious story
Guess who has two thumbs and broke her boyfriends dick?
Interesting, I was always told to run away from crazy, but you seem to think we should run towards them dick first.
So my plane's delayed and some guy is talking to "sparkles" he just told her to never again sell drinks from her cleavage. This is why I don't go home
Randomize