Hehe I wanna Australian kiss.. Its like a French kiss but down under ;)
ok i'm going to motor boat your sister now. ttyl
So Delta doesn't take cash. I used my card to buy a drink and asked the attendant if she could leave it open.
How do you politely bring up someone's criminal record?
I just remember her telling me "Hi, my names Kaissa and I'm a lesbian" over and over and over and over again as I was crying.
we're tailgating intramural basketball with hard drugs and tequila...and i think the players are taking shrooms
I found a horn on the street but it's okay I disinfected it with vodka
I'm just saying, asking "Are you happy with me?" during a handjob is simply unfair and scientifically inadmissiable.
I don't think he knows what shame means anymore. He gave some bar slut his sisters Tiffanys necklace, in exchange for anal.
It was like being fucked by the god of thunder, he gained power from the storm. I took a Plan B because I don't think regular birth control will stop Thor's sperm.
Young lesbians are the worst. And also what got me through high school, sooooo
Thanks for bringing me tea/a bucket. You have earned yourself a face touch.
Go to a building you've never been before and take a shit. It's marvelous
Yea he was still drunk. He wore a Toga to his job interview.
Woke up. Found about 20 condoms upstairs. A hole in the couch. Bread on the floor. Going back to sleep.
Randomize
