Hope the move went well! I'll miss you!
you are a cunt and I hated living with you and your skeezy boyfriend.Just thought I'd get that out there.
He said i was a degenerate twofaced catholic slut and a grade a bitch. Quite complimentary really. i guess i shouldn't insult the red wings
There's just this way he looks at me that makes me want to suck his soul out through his dick.
All I remember from last night is puking up a box of cheeze-its and the building catching on fire.
What part of "you pissed in the tent" do you not understand?
Also, putting laundry hampers on my head and pretending I'm an astronaut is a good way to get caught in every door frame in the house.
There is a literally infinite number of spliffs going around this table.
Delicious
I feel like I'm at a sushi bar with a spliff belt.
You know the cave of wonders in Aladdin? That's how I feel about his apartment. Except with blow and other treasures.
I'm gonna have to shit in a bar again tonight
I told two kids in their homecoming outfits to use a condom because of Ebola. I may have saved a life last night
He had to put his grandma's photo away before I tied him to the bed. She doesn't need to see any of that.
I lost my voice. So I'm going to pretend I'm Ariel with legs today.
He has a bear rug in his room. I'm going to ask if we can have sex on it. Wilderness sex.
Like my mom really needs to know just how non existent my sex life is
Im too stoned for my mom to be picking up hitch hikers. Help.
Randomize