she tasted like a mixture of sweat and destiny
I was just making a list of the girls i have slept with and i can't remember your sisters name
beer pong: waldo and ernie vs. bacon and eggs... i love halloween
official worst smell ever. a used condom that has gone through the dryer.
how many days can you live off of Vicodin and frosty?? im going on 4 days......
i told her she would have to blow me everytime we lost a game of beer pong, she never noticed i purposely hit our opponents in the face every other shot
My professors need to stop cancelling class. Bad things happen when I have too much free time on my hands. Bad things.
Whatevss it will be funn .. Hopefully no one projectile vomits on the wall again.. Its kinda become a tradition though
He managed to tell me he was blind in one eye and convince me to have sex with him in the same conversation. It's love.
Umm... How do I tell my roommate someone shot a speargun through the wall? On a side note, cliff shot a speargun for the first time.
Dude, I found out having naked people in your car is a felony.. Now were all fucked.
I just learned my tits were fire resistant. I should join the freakin circus
Lmfao I'm not trying to have a pissing contest over acid with my mom.....
hes like bread. how could bread be dangeous
You ever just SEE a guy and know he's good at choking someone out?
It's 3 am.
Randomize
