I puked in a mailbox on the way back from your house.
I got so high last night I started crying because i couldn't stop thinking about how scary space is
Sex on a kitchen table is not as amazing as they make is seem in the movies.
at the resort hottubing with french twins, who brought champange. this should be a postcard.
I'm wearing an NBA shooting sleeve while jerking off...and yes my arm has stayed warm
there is just no excuse for touching your mothers vagina.
Im surprised putting the throwing knife "dartboard" next to the door didnt end up worse
You just want to fuck a girl in a dinosaur costume, don't you?
I'm trying to have a "pick me up from my house so I can get completely annihilated night" any takers? Cmon people this is what friends are for
In hindsight following that black guy in the ghostbusters costume was a terrible decision on everyone's part
It's amazing where one well timed dick pic can get you in life.
It's a little hazey but I think I tried to request Nelly last night. There was no dj. Not sure who I was talking to
logically I know i should probably study somewhere outside my dorm room, but if I do that then I cant drink and smoke half as much while i study
And ANOTHER guy that I once got naked is doing gay porn now. Wtf? Am I the audition?!
He ate me out in a limo while we were driving home. I love bars being open again!
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