This last weekend single handedly took me off the liver transplant list
wasted. watching meteors, awesome idea i ever had, see 2 for every 1 with ma double vision
an unopened bag of salt and vinegar chips... probably the best thing I've ever found in my room while high.
Wait, how is it that I'm just getting ready to go out and you're already showing your penis to freshmen girls?
I fell asleep at the bar. And the bouncer threw a snowball at my face.
Staying in I think. Boyfriend has domesticated me. I'm making eggs naked right now. Also really high.
Is it appropriate to put "Mommy and Daddys shitfaced-ness that led to Aubrey" on a birth announcement?
Well you two just had a kid in the middle of college, I dont think anyone will notice.
Thanks bro
Well for number 40 i would prefer to at least like the guy attached to the dick
This family outing has commenced with me throwing up in an apple orchard
Not remembering where I left my grinder before vacation #stonerproblems
I'm gone to the point of literally hugging trees, partially for support, but also because I like them.
I smoked a joint in the bathtub at 8 am then went back to bed
I got my period during my acid trip. It was weird.
You cannot steal the fun of my nakedness. You do not own my nakedness. My nakedness is my sole property and I share that fun with whom I choose.
I had a date last night. His dog threw up in his bed while we were having sex in it.
Randomize
