ok shes still asleep, should i pee on her and say she did it herself? and by the time you respond to this ill probably have already made the decision
The problem with having your drunkeness documented at a wedding is not only does it show up all over facebook, but all over professional photography websites.
I can't remember if the bartender cut you off after you broke your glass or after you wished the bar a happy winter solstice during your karaoke number.
The druken crowd just broke into singing "God Bless America" while waiting the newlyweds to get in the limo. My friend is eating rose petals.
They glued all of the ceiling tiles shut.
oh my god. you caused complete remodeling to a college campus that you don't even go to
My ex was here I looked him in the eyes when I grabbed some other guy by his belt and dragged him to a room
I want you inside of me and on top of me and under me and behind me
Basically I need you to be like god, just fucking everywhere
I realized after pounding back 151 and head banging into each other to "the drop" of that dub step song, that we weren't meant to have boyfriends at this point in time.
As if finding out the man you just had sex with is married isn't bad enough, it gets so much more awkward when his wife comes in to comfort you...
so i might have figured out why that girl isn't talking to me...I'm 90% confident I didn't give her a pillow when she stayed over >.>
I woke up naked to an alarm set for 11:18 pm and missing a shoe. How was your night?
I'm going as your incestuous sister. If thats not the perfect winglady I don't know what is.
Apparently, Lolla sends you an email every time you use your wristband to buy a beer.
21 new emails...yikes
he was peeing off the deck shouting "urinals are for pussies" that's how much hurricane.
Never let the horse trainer ride you, always ride the horse trainer. I have huge bruises on my thighs from his hip bones. That's how hard he rode me
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