i wonder if she has dreads down there too...
Hey, don't feel sorry for me, the two girls in front of me just ordered 18 dollars worth of taco bell. Life could be worse.
i just ate an entire onion plain. all alone. i have never felt more single in my life
It felt like he was juggling my kidneys with the head of his penis... If you could even call it that, it was more like a lochness monster. Huge and mythical.
MASS TEXT! MASS TEXT! Your sad horny friend has finally gotten it in and can go back to being normal once again. You're welcome.
Sweet. I'm actually coaching my work study into a 4-girl orgy so dinner was kinda important. Yes, I'm the best boss ever.
The chick who threw the party was all pissed cause she thought I made out with her boyfriend. Admittedly, I did, but she was throwing up and crying at the time so she really can't be that mad.
Make the kitchen floor stop waving. Im trying to lay on it
I was at a bus stop, eating a load of bread. Fairly sure I'm the poster child for poor students.
He better be a good lay, these underwear cost $50.
tbh I think I just dated him for his dogs in the first place.
Dude is PACKING. And yes I am holding up a cross and holy water and hissing like a pissed off goose.
Lo siento on account of my penis...
I blacked out. Broke into their house. Took a shit, and left. This is why you can't leave me unattended.
are you drinking tonight?
I have an exam tomorrow
so yes.
Randomize
