why did i save someone in my phone as corn dildo?
I've decided to bang my pen-pal.
Oh yes. The girl who wanted me to watch her pee.
I just put a picture of what I imagine Rob's dick looks like on it on my vision board. thank you Oprah!
i just realized that fran drescher is the 90's version of a guidette.
So I put about 15 worms in the cuervo bottle. I don't think that's how it works but I feel like hallucinating by 11am
I feel like none of my dresses scream slut the way I'd like them to
Should I tell him the real reason I was in the hospital, or should I just keep him thinking the side effect he thought was in for was allergy related, not I just miscarried the child I didn't know we were having?
I'm still hoping for it dude. Random north dakota pussy. If my 16 year old self knew that these were my dreams he would so try to beat me up, and i think he could.
The owner of this phone is no longer accepting texts from liars, assholes or married men. You figure out which one applies.
Sometimes I love sober logical me. She makes rare appearances but when she does she shines.
after you left he started opening his bottles by smashing the neck against the edge of the fireplace and pouring beer into his mouth. it was about the manliest thing ive ever seen. its probably how lumberjacks open their beers... if they didnt have their axes handy.
Your youporn search history says otherwise.
you put your keys in the fridge so you wouldn't forget your yoohoo
ok morning sex is a totally valid reason to come in late... ur good, cya in 20
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