I feel like my sweat is 40 proof right now
You know that bakery that Sandra Bullock's sister owns?
The one in Montpelier?
yeah, well it doesn't exist anymore. VT's one fucking claim to fame closed.
I should be nowhere even remotely near facebook in this condition.
I'm thinking of writing "I have herpes" on my stomach in sharpie that way I'm not tempted to show my tits tonight
Still bad at ganbling. Still good at dringing.
The only thing that makes me want to stop the affair is that I am the Monica Lewinksy in this triangle.
I'm really hoping to find some quality strange ass tonight while at my court appearance.
And now I'm drinking leftover wine in the grad lounge because fuck my life
our next stoner-chievment: cream of shroom soup. Get over here, this is happening!
I'm on my way back with the wine... And a puppy. It was free.
no one ever believes me when I try explaining to them that your straight. I'm all like, "yeah that's his girlfriends dress he's stretching out"
stop fucking thinking about him when there is A MILLION OTHER PENISES TO RIDE IN THE WORLD
I seriously feel like I just crawled out from under a shit covered rock. I'm NEVER drinking like that again...well, not for alteast a solid 3 hours.
I just made myself orgasm twice and Laura lee hit 4 million subscribers. It’s a good day everywhere
For some reason drunk me always leaves sober me a banana in the morning.
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