sent the pic of my tit to the wrong bbm chatroom
i was so drunk i stopped mid-blowjob to make sure he i was with my boyfriend and not some random. twice.
shes on the floor puking and texting simultaneously.
For using a life jacket as a pillow, I slept pretty good last night...
im not going to any frat parties next semester. for once i want them to think its actually hard to get in my vagina
Using his name makes it all too personal. I refuse to get attached to this one. This is all about ass. He doesn't get a name.
I am 100% planning on being drunk on Wednesday. This is America. Work or no work.
I'm gonna rob all up in that cradle
She could makes a perfectt roast dinner drunk but she nearly sets the kitchen alight microwaving popcorn.
Do you rver get that feeling like their are poprocks filling ur boday?
I made a nest in his bed. I'm not leaving
Would it be totally wrong, that in honor of princess leias death, I role played as her??
idk what happened last night but i just wokeup with nothing on but a necklace...what is this, the fucking titanic?
How do you say, "I love you, but i prefer sex with someone else." in a good way? Ponder that over a jack and coke and get back to me.
Something is wrong here. The birds are chirping and I'm not fucking you, I'm not getting head and I don't smell bacon. Why am I up this early then?
Randomize
