lol you are funny thanks bro I'll take you to a strip club
I don't wanna go to a strip club I'd rather get my boobs free or earn them from a series of good deeds
Ha! What's wrong with that? Hard work deserves compensation. I accept cash, checks, and boobies!
I wish I could punch you in the face.
I have a pretty basic diameter of my vaginal abyss. I'm sure it won't hurt.
I just saw a woman point to her daughter and scream at her husband THIS IS YOUR GENES, THIS IS YOU.
Do you ever look back at facebook pics and say, "are those really guys I had sex with?"
i'm laying naked in your bed you should probably come home
move.
please dont pick me up from the airport dressed like a terrorist.
And the best part is that she's coming home to find that I completely shaved her dog.
I'm at the point in my life where I'm trying to get guys I've fucked to give a ride to guys I'm going to fuck.
I remember nothing of last night, but I did manage to figure out which frats I went to by the trails of straw across campus.
He stumbled out of the bar bathroom at 3:30 am with his jeans unzipped and his dick hanging out - it was the physical manifestation of "blackout with your cock out"
In related news, I couldn't want to blow you more if your dick made harmonica noises.
Watching this game makes me realize that we have yet to do Skype shots. What kind of long distance alcoholics are we?
Who put the meatball sub on my door handle?
I'm going to need to invest in some knee pads if I keep having nights like tonight
Randomize
