I think your x's eyes are broken his new girl is so hit
no, he's only a walking dick if he mans up. right about now he's just a walking transgender.
I am pretty sure he just licked my hand while trying to sing goo goo dolls iris to me. Get me out of this state.
You're asking the wrong person. I was drunk on nyquil and jager.
Ya but I plan to getting arrested more towards the end of summer
I've liked him since I puked on him on my birthday so I want it to be special.
I love that my idea of a romantic gesture to you is to send you a picture of my vomit saying "wish you were here". You voluntarily dated me. For six years ish.
Also, if you all get arrested i'm coming to laugh at you because i don't have the money for bail.
I was just informed that I have the perfect belly button for body shots... Best compliment ever.
Only I could host a baby shower where the cops get called.
She was chasing her shots with beefaroni and I think I fell in love.
He told me I smelled like peanut butter, pepperoni, and pure unbrieldled passion.
Are there rules against fucking your ex's dealer?
I can't go to Fassler and not immediately think about you licking a guys wife's butthole in the family restroom
You spilled your drink, and we laughed so hard my boobs popped out of my shirt.
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