Have you ever noticed that nowhere is the same thing as now here, i get my best ideas when i smoke
sometimes when i'm walking through campus i wonder how many of these people have seen me puke
People are handing out olympic condoms downtown, just put it on and it broke, this is how there trying to raise the population. Very sneaky canadian government, very sneaky
Just made a photo collage of the girls I've hooked up with this summer. I'm patting myself on my back right now
Idk if you remember me telling you about him, but I gave him a hj under the stars. Kind of added a little disney aspect to the whole experience.
I'm drinking wine alone, eating leftovers, and cleaning my sex toys. For the love of god, do not graduate.
Ya I guess if we compared our actions now with our actions 2 years ago. We are definitely in a constant state of shit showness.
I want to lick his teeth again. Is that a creepy thing to say?
I also love my swipe to text changed a singular vagina to a plural vaginas. like my phone somehow knows I secretly want 2 vaginas
THIS IS WHY I WENT TO SCHOOL FOR TO BE A COSMETOLOGIST TO HELP MY EX BOYFRIENDS CURRENT GIRLFRIEND BE MILDLY ATTRACTIVE... Everything DOES happen for a reason
THE SUPER HOT BARTENDER WHO LOOKS LIKE RYAN GOSLING JUST WALKED IN. BUT HE DOESNT EVEN WALK HE GLIDES. LIKE AN ANGEL.
I just can't have sex in the car again. it's just too much
2:34, make a wish! I wish I wasn't on acid at Planned Parenthood. What's yours?
Just imagine a dick squawking like a parrot
how did i manage to wake up with my bra on backwards?
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