These people need to leave so I can have rum and Doritos at work like every other American.
Desperate + desperate does not equal a fun night.
stalking is really helping my grade.. I followed him to a review session tonight
ok watching intervention on tv. when i hit rock bottom - i wanna be THIS chick.
Can't wait to go see my drug dealers baby being born. He rolled all of the "it's a boy" cigars into blunts.
I wish his dick was as long as his hair.
Sonogram pictures belong on a fucking fridge...NOT FACEBOOK!!
you act like breakfast cereal isnt an entirely appropriate chaser
Also I think my taxi driver may have just died and we just happen to be on a 35 mph cruise control on 395...
You. Me. Frosting and a bed. Lets do this.
Today wasn't Sunday Funday, it was more like Sunday god is taking a shit on my life day
You wanted to go find him and we told you to sit down cause you kept stumbling. You yelled " I CAN STAND!! It's the walking part I can't figure out!"
Im wearing black today mourning the orgasm i couldn't get this morning :(
Do not tell me I cant do drunk math ever again, AND I made a creative way of telling him I want him to fuck me.
Man, I'm never going tanning again he noticed the burns on my ass
Randomize
