I just found that girl ____ on facebook, her activities include "church nursery" yikes
The a/c is broken so they cut a softball size whole in the freezer door. Goodbye deposit.
My vagina supports interfraternal relations
I think he offered to cook me dinner or cook me for dinner. Not really sure. Just smiled and nodded.
While all the other girls were trying to out skut the next, Cameron was just doing cartwheels around the bar. I think she's the only one who got laid.
fuck it. from now on whatever room i wake up in, i'm stealing clothes from. this walk of shame shit is too much without pants
I imagine my service panda will provide sufficient protection. At the very least it will be an irresistible cuddly distraction while I make good my escape.
I forgot I did whipits. Probably because my brain cells were killed from the whipits
it was good, but also weird. like, i came four times and then cried weird.
I feel like I would find myself in so much trouble if I hadn't married my DD.
I couldn't think of the word "bath" so instead I told him I was marinating in soapy water
how much boxed wine can one drink before work in a couple of hours?
Ultimate fat girl moment: I promised him my mouth for the night if he bought me a funnel cake..
It was just a matte of pubes and mustard.
how do i say "cradle the balls" in Italian
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