problem. drunk. stepbrother hitting on me again. help.
it was like eating out sand paper
We woke up in an inflatable kiddie pool full of both empty and full beer cans. In the middle of his dad's office. Oh, and we were locked in. Nobody remembers.
You act like this is the first time I literally thought I was invisible.
naw. unless you want me to sit in a corner, not understand english and eat all of your cheese then i don't think it's a good idea.
In their defense you were hugging a watermelon for a good portion of the trip
I love her to death but its like you have to do 5 lines of coke to be on her level.
Well I'm sleeping with two of them cause they have nice cars. And the third cause she has a big rack. I'm just really waiting for it all to blow up in my face so I can find a girl I'm actually interested in
He said I looked like a ballsack and I tried to choke him out with my Ghostbusters pajama pants. Happy fucking Halloween.
So last night took an interesting turn.. Never thought I'd say I had to pick up my glasses off the floor of a strip club
LEAVE ME AND MY NIPPLES ALONE
Hi, I put a dog in your house, I hope it's yours.
I'll explain later but I just had to legally commit to abstinence for the next 4 months
I can't believe just smoked out of a pear
I can't believe you had a pear already made to smoke out of, that was impressive
Step one: We finally agreed on an au pair that we both wanna fuck.
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