i'm watching degrassi (go figure) and the episode is about jimmy not being able to get a boner and now he's famous and rapping about popping pussies..i dont get it.
And next time, don't pick a fight with me when you're naked. That's just not fair
Next time I say "Watch this" Get me the fuck out of the bar.
I made out with a bride-to-be last night at the bar. Jesus died for our sins right?
You do realize that you're sleeping with a man who is part of a gay harem, right?
what are we doing this weekend?
I have enough booze to get us through Armageddon...which basically means that on Sunday we will have to make a trip to the liquor store.
his teacher called to say he gave a girl on the playground a rock to touch his penis. proudest moment of my fatherhood
I've decided I want to blow you wearing a santa hat.
Aren't rabbit ears more seasonally appropriate?
I'm sitting at work trying to dust glitter off my pants. I can't hang out with her anymore.
I'm just gonna stay I'm bed where it is warm and cozy and nobody knows me as the girl that puked on a stripper
Ps I just used the "If you give a mouse a cookie" defense in a real life situation. Suck it
I give up. I can't handle that class sober any longer. I have an army of whiskey shooters for the next three weeks. Wish me luck.
Then again I went over his house after not hanging out since kindergarten and tried to fuck him so maybe I'm partially to blame here
we had sex while we waited for the thai food... a which will come first type of situation
Question: the touchscreen on my phone randomly quit working, do you think this could be a latent reaction from me peeing on my phone last weekend?
Randomize
