I want to kish your cheek
My cheeks are in Michigan
Oh my lips are kind of stretchy
I love sluts.
I end my prayers with that every single night.
Things I've learned: after you move in with a girl it's much less satisfying to wipe your dick on her sheets after sex because now they're your sheets too
zippers are such a cool invention
Do you think I can haggle my way to discounted weed on 4.21?
We waited til after. Not even drunk sex felt right during a Disney movie.
Also, the zoloft kicked in and I can't get an erection anymore. So I'm depressed.
I just had a flashback of 4:30am: me hugging the toilet bowl and you handing me a jar of pickles to open. There is something seriously wrong with us.
I can't say "baby i'm to high to talk to you" in Starbucks.
I found his Linkedin the day after he created it. Too stalkerish or just right?
Well I'm sleeping with two of them cause they have nice cars. And the third cause she has a big rack. I'm just really waiting for it all to blow up in my face so I can find a girl I'm actually interested in
I got drunk by myself and ended up listening to Beethoven in the dark.
I still don't know his name but his ass is spectacular. Like he should never wear pants.
I think people are normalizing furries
I have mastered the art of having sex on monkey bars.
Randomize
