Dude, just got a bummer.
What??
A blow job from a homeless chick.
it's like everything I expected to see tonight all put together in one at once
that is the greatest description ever
Just want you to know I am def drunk enough to burn down your house. Don't worry I checked the stove like 6 times. I love grilled cheese
at the last minute we also decided to throw an egg in the beer bong. and he drank it, shell and all.
I already have one guy that I have regrettable sex with. I don't need another.
i asked the cop if we could stop and do a chinese firedrill.... he said no.
What happened to my knees?
You ate shit in front of the homeless people. They applauded.
Competitive oral. I'm always telling girls they are only the fourth, maybe third, best blowjob I've had. They go back down with something to prove.
A guy just picked up ur brother and carfied him away singing and im slight concern
I see your boobs were ready to greet the new year.
So it's official the pockets of my work apron exist solely for the purpose of secretly flipping off asshole customers and not losing my job.
I'd like to buy a season pass to your dick please.
i had every intention of working out now im just drinking wine and thinking about taking nudes in my thigh high tube socks
His boxer smelled like clean laundry while I was giving him head. It was delightful, like sucking a dick in a spring meadow.
Look, his dick is so good at being a dick that it makes me see God. And I don't even believe in God.
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