She highfived me after i yelled "I'm the clit-commander!" when i came. kevin smith fan and clearly a keeper
i just made a "things you cannot forget to do this week just because you're high" list.
I knew her barely 30 minutes before we got naked. This whole fraternity thing is starting to grow on me...
There are many reasons why he shouldn't come over. And each one is longer than his penis.
Be honest with Daniel. He was a good rebound to you for nine months and he made it so you could be with the one you really love and care for now. Just tell him thanks and best of luck.
On the bright side I got 500 American Express points paying for the abortion
I can'nr wwn explain this nihght . So amnt dixks. Shitttttt.
You need to get here now. Before they realize I'm not puerto rican.
You could probably play six degrees of separation of my cock in this city.
Will you just get over yourself and come over here and give me that dick...then you can go back home and continue to cry over us breaking up. Thank you
So, were they human bite marks at least?
Your guess is as good as mine.
I discovered a new stretch mark. DONE. LITERALLY DONE.
So I bet a guy he could drink two irish car bombs faster than me and I lost. now he gets to name our first son. sory.
I'm drunk and he's still weird.
I've struck affair-gold. He's hot, he's ripped, he doesn't want a relationship, and most importantly he won't have to ask Gods permission to bang me like the last religious nut job did.
Randomize
