If Rob Pattinson gets another fucking MTV award, I'm going to vomit.
Whatever. They have the same name, so it's not even cheating. It's brand loyalty.
just peed in the tub. didnt notice the passed out drunk guys there until a minute in
Always fun waking up to 911 as your last dialed call.
2 classes, 3 finals, and $30 worth of adderall until this semester is over.
I think I'm going to postpone my photo shoot until my Gpa dies. I don't want to be in lingerie and stripper heels when I finally get the call
I'm unshowered, and since I've seen this episode of say yes to the dress, I've decided to go to the store and get a frozen pizza at 10:20 am. I'm crushing life.
I just yelled at a bunch of girl scouts for yelling "cookies" to loudly. That hungover
There was a reason God said "Let there be titties" on the Fifth Day.
You've created a tinder dominating monster.
I walked out in my coconut bra, and that's when it all went downhill.
Well, she chose the fuckboy life or the life chose her. Not sure which one but either way I don't need that negativity in my life.
I don't even know if he's actually hot or just hot because he plays hockey..
You did not just say that.
You spilled your drink, and we laughed so hard my boobs popped out of my shirt.
when you come over can you bring tequila and my birth control? Thanks girl!
Randomize
