I dont kno what was worse. Waking up 2 a guy next to me thinking I got blackout or realizing it was your boyfriend.
Let's bang like we're on a Lifetime Channel movie.
I don't know if you realize how depressing it is to get your card denied....when you're only spending $4.
Stop staring at my boobs, I can't concentrate
Well how do you think I feel
fair enough
Its trashy in the best of ways. Like a stripper working to pay for college.
By the way, i got bored and just started putting my balls on every object in your room. One at a time.
Believe it or not, Travis and I simultaneously breaking beer bottles over eachothers heads was not a good idea.
Did you know that scruff feels epic on boobs especially when they are covered in whip cream?
So he's compensating for a really small penis. Either that or he's a drug lord.
I think the moment I knew you were going to black out was when I told you how many shots you had already and you were shocked and then poured another one
I've had to do a couple req orders today and I would like to submit to you an order form to requisition DAT ASS
The CEO is on this whole 'what do you do with your spare time?' kick. Umm... get drunk and have sex in bar parking lots.
We got caught fucking on the couch while I was in my Godzilla onesie.
Roomies told me I showed up to my house alone with no pants on and burrs in my hair... I live in the middle of the city
I figure I since I made out with him that I at least had to save his number in my phone.
Randomize
