can you pick up canola oil? she lives by wegmans
who is canola oil?
you're an idiot.
I just Googled "how to lose weight but still be an alcoholic."
I just heard a guy scream "it must be five o' clock!!" and another guy screamed "somewhere!!!" out from different balconies.
i may have reached my "but im high so it's cool" quota for the month.
I think we can all look back on last night and categorize it under, " reason why Cory can't be left at the bar by himself"
We carried on a casual conversation about plants while I gave him a hand job.
He couldn't stand on his own, but he managed to somehow to get to the beer garden and get served 3 more. I'm proud to call him my cousin.
i want to go make food but i'll have to face my mom after telling her that the random i'm sleeping with, whose name i don't know, told me I was "too slutty to be his girlfriend" when i was drunk last night
Is it rude if I don't go?
No. It is not rude if you don't go to her cat's Star Wars themed birthday party.
Ask her if it hurt when she broke through earths crust as she ascended from hell
come over. We can flirt with the criteria for substance abuse and talk about our daddy issues
He offered to take me to my appointment after breakfast then kind of just sat there and watched me get a papsmier. Most awkward first date ever.
I'VE LOST MY DIGNITY, MY PRIDE, AND EVEN MY BOOTY CALL. HAPPY THANKSGIVING.
If he comes over I probably get to fuck him and if he doesn't I don't have to pay him the $60 I owe him for weed. It's a win-win situation.
I'd give anything to be driving a pirate ship wearing nothing but a coconut bra and a grass skirt eating a pizza and watching dolphins jump in the waves. Dreams ya gotta have dreams
Randomize