...so i touched it.
I need to go to a fraternity... my boobs are telling me to.
we ike ciroccccc we love patroneeeee shost shothosthsothosthostsssss veryboyddddyyyy
go home
As im putting my laundry in the machine, i find a solo cup and a pong ball that i signed babe ruth
When he went down on me, I saw his bald spot... It completely ruined the experience
Her life is filled with shit luck. Its like mother nature is having her period and just taking it out on her specifically.
have to get expensive furniture. after that study abroad now at least six things at ikea are named after guys i slept with
I went through his pics. Will you go with me to get tested?
I'm calling in my "fuck at anytime anywhere" card. Meet me at my place in 20 min, wear your Waldo costume.
Well, that was my first dog walk of shame. Nothing says "I've got my life together" like an inside out shirt and a baggie full of dog shit.
Most tragic bathtub-fart of all time. I am going to be late.
I know he’s a bad decision but he's casual, his penis is amazing and his technique is on point.
I saw his new girlfriend. She was flashing people, short and kinda chubby. I was happy with my life after that.
The fact that you cheered yourself on while you puked saying it was your first college puke, blacked out, and sang taylor swift to the toilet confirms the fact that we are related. I've never been more proud.
I woke up this morning and my house is covered in shredded cheese with my laptop open and a google image search for "awesome shit".
Randomize
