For the record dan just proved he knows the first and last names of ALL the members of NSync. Jury is no longer out on his sexuality.
hooking up with chicks might be the way to go after all. walk of shame looks better in her clothes.
nothing says happy birthday like half a tampon wrapped in someone else's hair on your shoulder.
He looks like the kind of guy that still collects pokemon cards
I have now ridden the bus with a ninja, a samurai and Jesus. Who says the bus is for losers.
I wont be hard to find. Im wearing a darth vader mask and I have a megaphone.
I voted for him because his wife supports his raging sex life.
he left his wallet here so lets treat ourselves to a lunch for the lack of penis we both had deal with
She sprinted out of the bathroom and ran all the way into the middle of the street. Five minutes later she came back with a banana nut muffin. She's that kind of drunk.
holy shit i just had sex in a phone booth i so feel young again
Being drunk is way better. Seriously, I just licked your brother to make sure my spit was actually real.
I tried to roll down the stairs in a ball. I have bruises, the pain is too much.
What the fuck, why would you ever do that?
Haven't you ever just wanted to be a ball?
Everyone else in class agrees the weed smell is coming from me
All I want to do on Facebook today is comment on people I knew in high schools profile pictures and tell them how much uglier they are now.
You kept crying and I couldnt help but laugh at you, I was really high though.
Randomize
