O no, u 2 are dating again?
No. I just masturbate furiously to his picture
On a side note I can sing drakes “best I ever had” so good you’d think I was on degrassi.
You have to stop making references to your extense knowledge of 13 year old girl television programming for me to believe you aren’t homo. The Bravo line-up was one thing, but seriously
This is why you don't make out with cougars at a bar... I got a linkedin request from her, wtf?
Going abroad, it was like my vagina was in a candy store... a sweet sweet british candy store
get to allyx's house asap
Ok is everything ok
Yeah, theres just lesbians
omg yes on my way
uhh when the x-ray tec was moving your head you licked his hand and meowed.. i think he knew you weren't sober
Your cousin just asked the bartender to start a round of vagina shots. Not body shots. Vagina shots. We're taking her out more often.
I'm using the bullet from my cock ring to massage out my tmj lock jaw from giving too much head.
I don't want a baby! I JUST WANT AN ORGASM THAT ISN'T SELF INFLICTED.
I just googled "creative ways to tell someone you'll give them a blow job". I'm losing my touch.
Just did body shot off a midget. Pretty good start.
It might look like I curled my hair last night but it's just the jiz.
I just feel like if we dated, he'd just be crying the entire relationship
DIBS on your mom for my beer pong partner.
You're a wizard. You are a master of disguise. You are beautiful. I love you.
Randomize
