I think I just saw the travelocity gnome in leather chaps.
that would combine my 3 fave things. christmas funfetti and paul simon
He used his penis as a puppet and sang Rihanna's Hard..... so no, we will never see each other again.
Hey fuck you and your taint. I'm just riding a canoe called life, back the fuck off. P.s. I need a ride
the coastal evacuation route ends at my vagina so you can just skip the bullshit and come over
Why doesn't the washer have a puke setting?
Id fuck him but only at his house and he had to stay im bed till i left. He only works upper body. It just creeps me out how tiny his legs are
You are going to come home to a suitcase in the fridge. Just go with it.
you know i have almost 1500 fb friends but not ONE drunk booty call?
He was "hot guy in the dark". One of us had to sleep with him. I took the bullet you're welcome.
In other news my pubic hair is covered in glitter.
I can't handle more than one dick at once. I become crazy. It's hard to be mellow and free spirited and polygamous at the same time.
whatever. i don't need to be drunk to tell you i'd suck your dick if you had one.
sorry i was ignoring you last night i accidentally did a bunch of pcp and thought i was inside tron
apparently ive been in a long term relationship for the past 1 1/2 years w/ out knowing
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