ARI BLEW A 2.0 HAHAHAHAHAHHAHH THESE COPS ARE SO COOL!!!!
Getting high on the stoop of a brownstone in the middle oh harlem. Doesn't get much more hey arnold than this.
Can we have fireworks this year or will the ocean explode?
On my way home right now. I miss you. let's cuddle. whiskey.
moving back to school this early was a terrible idea we already used up our bail fund
I just dont understand why you didnt cut me off when I took the funnel into the bathroom and started peeing and funneling at the same time
It's not my fault. Someone keeps buying me tequila shots. Idk who. But every time I look down there's another. I think there's a conspiracy.
officially christened the dorm room by sucking my spilled drink off the floor. tastes like homee
Pretty sure the purpose of joining wine clubs isn't to drink the 2 bottles they send you each month IN THE SAME NIGHT.
I am very happy to share that the hospital says the testicle pain is normal and that they are going to take care of it.
Mainly I just wanna pet bunnies. And purple chicks. Well any color chicks if I close my eyes. But purple if I open them.
I'm going to try and loofah my hangover away.
Update: It didn't work
Do you want me to add this to the list of actions I will state at your intervention
He actually said the words 'I miss you' followed by 'I wanna have sex with your face'. I'd say that's a win.
Left him blackout in the cab, gave 20$ to the cabbie and said drive until the meter said he wasn't getting a tip.
Bangkok has him now.
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