i think he might wanna be bffs again, but idk cause we're friends again but we haven't been bff since like a year. i don't know what to think...
wow. what a nail bitter. i need popcorn for this. brb
My family is watching Intervention and taking notes. I need to leave NOW!
well he's currently spooning the coffee table
I wonder what a non-hungover friday at work is like
Part of my whole not being a slut anymore involves not giving other peoples boyfriends blowjobs
i drank out of my shoe...were you seriously expecting me to be the voice of reason?
If she asks the cat was vomiting before I fed it fried calamari
Kristy will be communicating through my phone. Due to her current blood alcohol level, the laws of Pennsylvania, Erie county, and common decency have deemed that she is no longer permitted to have her own phone.
Leaving your birthday party to engage in a threesome IS allowed. I checked the rule book.
When you didn't respond I figured you must be busy so I'm home in my pj's 2 beers in and stoned from weed I got from my gaybours. They also gave me cake. I'm not moving from this recliner.
The tequila monkeys have a drum solo in my skull right now. I can't imagine Emily feels better.
My favorite bra is missing and I smell like beer and bad decisions. This is definitely a sign that hoe mode is activated.
YOU ARE THE ONLY PERSON I KNOW THAT STEALTH CLEANS PEOPLE TOILETS
Damn that sucks I haven't needed pants the whole time i've been here
Congratulations you now have a pet Scotsman.
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