butt sex is not good for yourself don't do it
Thanks?
i permit you to call me
i'm so hungover...i might vomit in a handbag instead of selling them
She looked kinda like Mario Batali?
I only make drug deals in a British accent. It's my way of making sure it doesn't get too sketch.
Don't put random dicks in your mouth or any other crevice for that matter... and i'm home in 30 seconds
Wish I got that text last night instead of this morning.
i'm ready for this baby to gtfo so i can get coked out.
Some girl just showed me her stretch marks
You need to get out of tn
Operation: pick up a lawyer was a resounding success. Commence operation: football mugshot weekend
I think we've reached the point in the summer were we need to go back to school. I was so bored yesterday I nearly bought blow dart gun.
Please keep in mind you are asking relationship advice from a girl who fucked a guy just because we have the same name. Just keep that in mind.
My early Valentine's Day one night stand just took an uber home. Thank you, technology, for letting me enjoy this day in peace. 😍
I went in for a high five.. He went in for a kiss.. Today is a good day
so evidently blowing a guy does not mean he will say hi to you when he sees you in class.. in case you're ever wondering
Dude, some chick came over here earlier and thought my lube was hand sanitizer. She poured it all over her hands.
Randomize
