I was taking a piss and started puking. I pissed myself and made a mess in the bathroom. Passed out, then got up and went back out from 11pm to 5am.
I changed 4 diapers and slept horribly in our hot apt. Now, I'm at my inlaws house watching the Rangers get pummeled. Oh how our lives differ.
not sure what to think.... picked her up and her dad says "if you take her home, you'll regret it"
It would be been irresponsible not to make cleaning the apartment into a drinking game
he confused my yawn for an orgasm
you woke me up at 7 am banging on my wall.. what the hell
thats the international knock for joint time
You dont lie about slip and slides
seeing two freshman taking a cab home at noon on a Monday makes me realize how much worse my life choices could have been
You went streaking and came back with your shirt inside out. Then said "it happens in the line of duty" and passed out.
We get an extra hour of sleep. That means we can take an extra shot tonight. Sound logic. Thank you daylight savings.
I AM OFFERING YOU ALCOHOL AND THE CHANCE TO LET ME SAY FUCK IT TO MY RESPONSIBILITIES. HOW MANY TIMES DOES THIS HAPPEN?!
So the day after the 4th I'm sitting here drinking Molson and watching NHL free agent frenzy. From patriotic American to drunken Canadian in 24 hours flat. Booyah.
YOU DONT EAT A GIRL OUT AND THEN GO PUKE ASSHOLE
lesbians are really intense tho, she made me take her eye makeup off and told me she was going to eat me for breakfast
What was I even doing in 2010?! I feel like that's a question I should be able to type into the Facebook Search bar
But yeah, I am thinking that "Cake Heresy" will now be a thing
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