I had to remind him that there is no "age exchange rate" between the u.s. and spain, and that 16 will always equal 16
He is drunkenly eating my teddy grahms and making little growling noises as he bites the head off of each one.
So I'm on the can right now reading a court transcript for an appeal. Some dude is paying $155 an hour for me to take a shit.
It's all good. The CSI guy came and I played the theme song while he in was in our place. The cops even laughed.
Dude next time u fuck on our counters will u please let me know BEFORE I make lunch.
yeah dropping that class because i really don't want to be known as the girl who fell asleep in class and threw up as she walked out for an entire semester
I'm not pregnant. Security came before he could.
He wanted me to strip for him. I told him that we aren't at that serious of a fuck buddy relationship yet
Star Trek does not adequately answer all the questions that I have about alien genitals
Come back. Shots need mouths.
Oh dear God, they have a song about Mom...
He washed his dick in my kitchen sink after sex. I think he might be a keeper.
Hey so I got my period
Thank god I wasn't ready to deal with sober you for 9 months
Drugs and unwanted pregnancies are the only things that I'm good at. College comes in at a close third.
I passed out while searching "symptoms of narcolepsy"...
Randomize
