It doesn't have to be a walk of shame...just pretend he took you to breakfast.
No one shows this much boob at breakfast
While sitting in bed naked eating ramen and watching the colbert report I realize why random sex happens.
no more hot dogs for you........
fine no more vajj for you
Call 911 I'm faking my own death so this fat chick leaves my room
im kinda looking forward to winter break. ive been away from home for so long i think i can trick my vagina into thinking that these arent the same people ive been hooking up with since high school...
We were talking about threesomes when she went to say who she would have as her third. She did not get to finish her sentence because her bf already said my name.My sheer presence destroys relationships.
The blackout version of me left a ransom note to the sober self. Somebody needs to control that guy
High water is the most godliest tasting water in the world.
is leaving the club to fk in his friends van subtle?
The only thing I know is that these arent my shoes and Aaron is missing and he has my house keys.
The next time we go out, we're bringing a jar so that people can contribute to the rest of what I need to come up with for my breast implants... We'll show them yours for inspiration and persuasion.
Fucked him in a graveyard. Need plan b.
Why does my car smell like burnt toast?
I take it you don't remember trying to make grilled cheese with your cigarette lighter...
If I'm legally allowed to go to jail than I should legally be allowed to tell a cop to fuck off. Basic principles.
Yea, but did you really have to throw a sandwich at him??
I hate csi yet I find myself watching a full marathon. I am also eating hotdog buns stuffed with barbecue chips and they are quite tasty
Randomize
