I'm just sayin u wanted to sleep after ur paper. I can make u sleep
i'm at sigma nu and gary is here. what do it do?
Stay away from his face.
so i go for his dick?
Who keeps a bong in their car??
Kids who graduated high school two weeks ago.
I wish I had more reasons to start sentences with the phrase, "Here's the thing you've got to remember about cougars ...
And when I say "complete whore" I mean I could possibly make a shameful profit by wearing this.
It's all sex hats and vagina bandages with you isn't it?
All I want to do is fuck in the bell tower before it leave this school. Is that too much to ask?
It's ok that you're screwing someone else while trying to get back with me, I'm banging three girls while I ignore you.
Getting drunk before noon on a Tuesday. When did this become my life? Did you know that a six-pack of Smirnoff is 2 liters?
When have we listened to the rational side of either of us?!
I would pay to watch a Bravo special of you getting Botox.
Walked into a bathroom stall to pop an addy for my three back-to-back finals today. Felt like Clark Kent walking into a phonebooth.
I told him I had an IUD and he asked me how was a bomb a form of birth control..
When dressing for a 3way, how do I convey to the other chick I care enough to look pretty but not so much that it's a huge deal?
I woke up on the couch screaming in pain. I don't know how ended up there or why my foot was double the size. all I know is I'm now in a cast and never drinking tequila again. worst hangover ever.
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