I'm sorry, but there's just something about mesh over nipples that irks me.
Charles is a playa. And I don't mean the spanish word for beach.
her boobs were like sundried tomatoes..
she starting giving me head in the taxi..the driver told her to stop..she looked up, said "I'm the birthday girl", and kept on doing what she was doing.
there really is only one way to give a PowerPoint presentation in your senior capstone class: still drunk.
You're being dramatic. You can calm down, or you can piss off. Either way, I ate your burrito.
You know, he picked a really shitty time to stop sleeping with me to pay attention to his girlfriend.
So basically he tried to get out of the car and crawl on the highway with the broken leg because he didn't want to go to the hospital. It was not a good time...then we got pizza though.
I was just laying in bed wondering if there's more important things in life than cheese stuffed pretzels.
Last night we got home from the bar and saw a fox outside and we lured it in the house with a piece of cheese. Just wanted to party with some potentially dangerous wildlife I guess.
Bro, she said my penis was the best thing to happen to her mouth since teeth.
idk the fact that her roommate had a sign that said "enter without knock, exit without cock" makes me really NOT want to go steal her pot.
Can I borrow your google glasses to make a sex tape?
there is a guy with a glowstick staff outside my house
He caught a Pokemon on my head while I sucked him off. I think I need to marry him.
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