She told me a very interesting story, complete with pantomimes, about how she got a habanero seed in her vag
I totes stole your whore crown.
With great power comes great responsibility.
They asked if I wanted to shotgun a beer and before i could ask who had a knife they all had bit holes into the cans. Im never leaving Germany!
drinking out of a sandbucket again
That was the first time I have seen a confused expression with a dick in the mouth
We had to leave. Dave knocked a dude out for saying yolo.
Why can't I live in a world where my only 2 options are rum bikini hot tub party or masturbating?
Balls are being tripped. Said meow to my cat and he said yeah cool dude.
Dude true life I died at the derby...I lost everyone I knew, went down a bourbon and mud slip and slide, lost my hat, fell off the roof of a porta potty, sprained my ankle and knee and then got arrested.
I told him his only options were from behind or me on top. I was not about to mess up my $80 blow out before graduation.
So "I hate myself Mondays" has extended to Tuesday this week. I just had peanut butter and a glass of wine for lunch.
Was just trying to have a normal "I fucked you without a condom" adult conversation and she flipped
I am more than mildly offended he didn't screenshot the snapchat of my boobs.
I have a bunch of bug bites on my ass... This is why you don't have sex against a tree in the woods
the fact that your 21st birthday is also new years eve is pretty much a death sentence
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