I'm at the bar with Ashley what should I do?
humiliate her
You can bone my sister, but I will end our friendship if you write 'LOLERS' one more time at the end of your texts.
i guess its not very common for a paramedic to have to revive someone who was struck by a falling shampoo bottle while getting off from the bathtub faucet.
I hated hipsters before it was mainstream.
He will not just "come" out of the closet. He will fall out, 69ing me, with two fingers in his starving asshole, wearing cum splattered lady gaga sunglasses, weeping.
That was the greatest thing i have ever read.
Not much, just your average college male Sunday cleaning period blood out of the carpet.
Tell me you're kidding.
Besides scarred, I'm not much of anything right now.
I woke up this morning with a sharpie tramp stamp. Pretty sure it's a picture of a squirrel.
It's gay softball weekend. Lots of hot gay strangers to go home with.
Did she owns a vibrator that will set off seismic activity.
We hooked up in his car and afterwards he cried. I think I need to find a new hookup...
Wanna have a sleepover and take me to court in the morning?
Okay but look at his jawline. I NEED TO RIDE IT.
Who am I kidding? With my track record, I'm going to end up sleeping at the strip club with just nipple tassels on.
my comprehension of H.D. Thoreau really dives after 8 beers.....
It will astound me if they ever let you graduate.
Two questions: Did you enjoy your birthday present and how did i wake up with glitter all over my dick?
Randomize
