I just put out an orange level terrorist threat on her punani
We walked past a group of guys in front of a bar last night and they claimed, I quote: Wow, we'd actually have to work for that.
we're at the bar and some girl dropped a bottle of burnettes strawberry vodka out of her purse and it broke.
i mean, if that's not class, then i don't know what is
i think i will get a tattoo on my butt that says "im not bluffin with my muffin", but i guess if i was serious, i would get it above my c-section scar
FIrst one done
How did it go?
I dunno I taled about women being treated wrong and quoted Ice T. So probably a "c"
our health teacher's ringtone is Bad Romance and she has a tramp stamp. i will not skip this class, ever.
GOING OUT OF BUSINESS: we're having a foreclosure party tonight...We'll also be raffling off a washer/dryer, microwave and a white tiger head.
She gives pretty bad head, but when it's in her dad's Lexus SUV it's tough to complain.
You fell out of your barstool, I tried to help you but you said if I got any closer I'd be drinking my meals through a straw, So there you sat.
Hope you don't mind if I never tell my family about you.
he said he needs a little more pabst, some time to jack off and a sandwich and he'll be ready
If you've never been partying there before, take Shae with you. Drunk Shae is like a GPS. She found us the only bottle shop still open at four, a pot dealer, and told us all which subway to take to get home. She'd never been to Madrid before. It was awesome.
He managed to find a wheel chair and a super mario hat, now hes rolling around screaming "real life mario kart!"
Gonna be hard to top last New Year's Eve when the guy I blew came at midnight
Nothing says Happy Thanksgiving like picking cocaine boogers out of your nose at your parents house.
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