i just saw a guy carrying a medieval times commemerative glass filled with vomit.. there were 2 people cheering him from behind
Just got a script for 120 vicodin with 6 refills. I feel like michael jackson.
I could make treat bags
you went to subway and got pissed when they refused to deep fry your sub
I started making breakfast to subdue the hangover and last of the shrooms and only got as far as eating a half frozen pierogi out of a dixie cup.
I don't go on dates. I watch tv and play with dicks. dinner is a situation.
I still have his teeth marks on the base of my penis. You didnt miss much
I took my exam the next day still drunk and failed, but I kno for a fact that I filled in the bubbles for my name perfectly
...if you're living vicariously thought me, that was a great blow job you just gave in the B&N parking lot.
Let me know when ur ready so I can throw up one last time then brush my teeth
The things I do for you. Not that I'm unhappy about it. I'm just saying you should love me.
Did you sleep with him again?
No! I just led him to believe that I would if he gets me booze. Do I have that little class that you have such minimal faith in me?
You're just gonna have to make the sacrifice man.
I'm trying to hide in the table.
I put on a tiger onsie to initiate sex... It worked
Your bf is wearing nothing but a cape, I mean absolutely NOTHING but a cape. I know you said he looks like Thor but this is getting a bit ridiculous.
Shit facedness and cuddling are what you have to look forward to this evening.
so i went to the bathroom and my thong was on sideways... i guess that solves the mystery
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