hide the guitars, Nate just learned to play free fallin'
At any point in time, have you stopped and thought "I wonder how high Willie Nelson is right now?
Go for the frenulum. Its like eating a popsicle. They go nuts with that shit.
It's hard to believe so much cum came out of such a small penis.
There's a hand-carved wooden bong in my backpack, and i really wish i could remember last night now.
If you would give me the chance we might have the two separate pieces of the greatest fuck puzzle ever.
My picture of a beer can in a McDonalds cup full of ice got more likes than my relationship with her. Is beer THAT much better than monogamy?
There is a visibable outline from you in the grass. its you in the fetal position...
I am wearing two different shoes and just swallowed my gum. Wake the fuck up and bang the bartender already.
I went back to the party but by then they were all sitting on the floor in the dark listening to we are the champions on full blast.
Waking up at a teachers house is a very confusing thing
He keeps telling me he's gonna get me dope for my birthday. 1. HELP ME. 2. HOW IS THAT AN ACCEPTABLE BIRTHDAY PRESENT. Also, please HELP ME.
Forced to cancel my booty call due to the snowpocalypse. This crosses the line.
I had a meltdown and you quoted Puddle of Mudd to me
Getting a UTI was SO NOT on my wishlist for the holidays
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