he saw my "i like bacon" magnet on the fridge and i told him how much i love meat, then we started making out
what a beautiful fairy tale
8th day he invented the big mac, 9th he invented pop rocks, 10th day boobs.
hey bro how do you do that fake vagina thing with the tp roll? im bored.
I cant wait for your democrat phase to be over.
any chance you can send me your legal ethics outline, in exchange for say, me buying you a lapdance the next time we go to the strip club?
I guess I tried to spit on a homeless man on the walk home...Out. Of.Hand.
I was really disturbed by what initially appeared to be a dismembered head sitting beside you. Then I realized you were laying on her body.
There is a homeless man handing out free beer on the city bus. He has a cooler and everything. I love this trashy yet generous city.
The heart of my unhappiness in my job is that it's not a place where coworkers and I can draw dicks on everything to amuse each other
I'm so glad we both made out with him though. I feel like that really brought us together
His grandpa picked him up. Brought him to the house. And made him clean the puke off the driveway with a broom and a bucket of water.
On the upside I'm hairless from the waist down. On the downside, I just chemically burned my labia
I'm ordering dildos in a santa hat. You?
she crossed my comfort zone...i thought i was a freak
said the guy with a pink sex swing...
Sooooooooooooo you woke up on a rooftop. Classy
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