well that was a long night...
dude, you were pretty messed up... what happened?
no idea... but i still woke up with my pirate hat on
Anywhere you can eat green eggs and ham, you can have sex.
you threw up into the pocket of your shirt. which was pretty damn polite
Bro what are you doing Thursday the day before I go to jail??
It was fine until he came back to my place, grabbed a beer, HIGH-FIVED me, and left.
After we drank 3, we built a raft out of the empties and installed the fourth submerged In the water to keep it cool. Keg boats are now a thing
my math prof is telling us what to do in a gun fight. i dont want to live in oakland anymore.
No work today. I woke up and someone had written "Markhot Penis = Party" on my forehead in sharpie. Do you know a Mark?
I'm high and I have a consensual booty call on the way and just thought that it was a good time to let you know that I think that you are a stellar person.
I would say I miss her friendship, then I remember that she gave 4 guys the clap. I'm good.
He doesn't want a full on relationship, he provides me with all the weed I can handle and gives me multiple mind blowing orgasms. He's my soul mate.
how am i in montreal? thats like a 3 hour train ride. i remember nothing.
She has an alarming number of pictures with cat ears but the sex is amazing.
the girl who hid my weed when the cops came has a birthday coming up. i feel like i should get her something.
Watching South Park, doing sit-ups and drinking tequila. In other words, my night is going pretty good.
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