I wish they made portable blow up dolls for girls.
It's called a dildo, genius. Go to sleep.
And then he came out of the bathroom in a kimono
I just stepped on my own foot and apologized to my shoe... THAT high.
There are beer cans & oyster shells along the side of the road. I belong here
I knew I was rolling hard when I realized I had been rubbing the couch for an hour
Can an epipen be used as a tranquilizer ?
I dare you to find another dealer that delivers bud to your home along with deep fried vegan burritos
Stop confusing me with every girl you know that doesn't like sex.
He just sprayed AXE in his mouth to get rid of his bad breath... THAT DRUNK
i cant believe the cop was fine with you saying no we are in a hurry when he asked to search your car
not being a booty call is very strange. Who knew there was so much time for activities at night!
Add tweezing eyebrows to the list of things not to do while on adderol....
thank you for being so understanding of my weak stomach and poor self-control
I a very close black and white picture of my slightly erect penis and I blew it up put it in an art gallery for a show coming up and somebody bought it for 30 Grand!!!
It's fucking 2020, I should be able to watch Netflix in the buff while making brownies without you getting preachy about it.
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