Help. Asians are flirting in front of me(773): They speak asian
Wow, your whole life is a joke regardless of the fact that its april fools day
You told her the u were going to wrap your dick around her neck and start her like a lawn mower. thats why she left.
Those are some awfully high standards for someone of your weight
I just had to google "How do I get semen stains off of drywall." I'm relatively proud of this
Im still in bed and cant move and i only had Two beers and a shot last night... how did I make it in college?
God gave us a 4 year grace period.
If I had KNOWN you and mom were coming to visit, I wouldn't have passed out in the frat. This is why I hate surprises.
I'll be there in 5 min. If not, read this again.
I woke up to him using my debit card to order PPV porn and Jimmy Johns. I don't even know his name.
he slipped a picture of a kangaroo under my door that said "im sorry" on the back and passed out on my lawn.. who the fuck is this kid?
It's ok. I will share any beautiful men that I drug and leave unconscious on my bed. I'm that kind of friend.
Before getting out of the car, she said "Thanks for getting me off." I like how polite she is.
I wasn't even hungover I was just mourning my dignity
Dude, who WASN'T thinking of motorboating her?
Could be all of this cough syrup, but I’m ready to fuck 2018 up!
Randomize
