I told her we could go facebook official. If she ups the oral.
I'm bringing poparts in case anyone gets hungry. The trek to frat row is strenuous.
Yeaaah, so cabbie laughed at me, and said, "rough nite? Let me find you some music" . apparently OPP is the appropriate ride of shame soundtrack.
Sometime between a drunk guy asking me if I'm a Beach person or a lake person WHILE HIS HAND WAS IN HIS FUCKING PANTS or breaking up a lady fight over peewee football league I started to reevaluate my life and self
Very excited! Vodka will be shot, dicks will be ridden, and memories made.
arnt you supposed to become a mature adult when you move out of your parents house?
Moving out doesnt mean I'm mature, it means I can make pancakes and bacon at 3 in the morning and no one can judge me.
Dude I just saw a beer truck w taps in the side... It's like god heard my prayers and sent me a gift from heaven
Still slightly drunk, sitting in Hyde park village. Two small children are dancing and singing "call me maybe" on the fountain in front of me. Am I hallucinating?
what's the least obnoxious place that i could barf on the bus?
Rob and I are cross faded and the only one taking care of us is a drunk person who's making us dance.
Did you send me a cake saying 'Happy 1st One-Night Stand Ever'?
Needless to say, I did not go home with him cause he kinda resembled a guppy fish.
The fact that u had sex with a Disney prince blows my mind, you're my hero.
i have paint on my face i'm missing my earrings, there's a bag of rice in my room, and i have a purse full of monopoly pieces
All I could think about was how many vaginas had been on the toliet that I was pukin in
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