Done. Eyebrows are waxed, entire body shaved
Trust me, I wear more condoms than socks. I wouldn't risk infecting my cock. It's my livelyhood.
I told him I was pregnant. Figured it would soften the blow of telling him I had herpes.
Did it?
Not as such, no.
Being college poor has reached a new low. I am giving up on masturbating so i can save money on toilet paper
I woke up because I was nodding to the dream question of "would you like a sombrero?"
Almost thought it was a good idea to call his parents to thank them for having a son with an awesome dick. That high.
Absolutely. Last time I signed up for a softball league I had sex with my high school economics teacher.
Ugh. This is the type of hangover that all other hangovers want to grow up to be.
I feel like we should actually go to church one of these days to thank god for saving us from herpes and babies.
I'm sober. Being kissed by a chick with a llama puppet. Shoot me now.
She's on her way over to shave my year round sweater vest into a festive argyle sweater vest. Keeper?
the girl next to me was drawing sonic the hedgehog on her exam what the fuck
godspeed
He's getting so into these sexts, I hate to tell him I'm fully clothes, watching Bring It On and eating chips and salsa.
hey man , the girl you brought home last night is in the kitchen puking in the sink and asking if she can have more shots of Whiskey....think i should give her a shot glass or send her home....
5 am booty call not ok. The fact I actually went over definitely not ok. My vag needs to learn some control.
Randomize