Am I the only person who thinks Megan Fox looks totally like a Thai lady boy with a serious tanning bed fix?
I think youre just another guy trying to take advantage of a young naive innocent girl
you're not innocent... Once you have taken it in the turd cutter you can't label yourself innocent.
I've come to accept that no matter where I step in our apartment, your underwear will be there.
Just heard Miley Cyrus' version of "Every Rose Has Its Thorn". Fuck everything. If you don't have an std you have no right to remake this song
My mom said that if she can come this weekend, she'll buy the weed.
Everything sucks i just wanna cry and smoke a bowl and pet my cat and die. All at the same time
I poured everyones drinks into the ice bucket and then stuck my face in it. Apparently I'm a greedy drunk.
I had him autograph the condom wrapper.
He insisted he brought his alarm clock everywhere, and then the girl screamed "fuck French people!"
I'm in public and Taylor Swift is playing. It is taking all my effort to not screech like a goat.
If you can't accept me drawing a Santa hat on your penis then we can't be friends
Let's go buy marshmallows and play chubby bunny until we feel alive again
well my apartment and my life are still a disaster but I did clean off my desk so that's gotta count for something...
I'm crying during the second episode of Golden Girls that's how high I am.
I got locked into my place today. You might be wondering if that was a typo... It's not.
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