Who's your beautiful friend? Please include the words "Straight", "Single", and "Legal" in your response.
Great, now everyone thinks I've had giraffe semen in me
i like that you affectionately refer to him as "creepy" ever time you talk about him
Robbie told me you spent 10 mins discussing the curl in his hair and that you said "with that curl in your hair, you'll go far"
Using 'equal to a modern day cock block" in term paper, inappropriate
When you wake up in your dorm right outside your room with the key in the door, then you will understand my pain.
uhh when the x-ray tec was moving your head you licked his hand and meowed.. i think he knew you weren't sober
i had choclate birthday cake for breakfast and am currently flossing my teeth w a condom wrapper. at work. hot mess for 200 alex
Ya I painted "STOP TRYING ANAL" on her headboard. I'm sick of listening to her whine through the wall and bitch the next day.
I just got carded by a ten year old.
All I've been thinking about for the past 12 hours is sex and SEAWORLD
I'm more of a "get high and take a bath" kinda guy.
i love it when bitches who pick on you in high school get fat. thank you facebook you have made my day.
As a courtesy going forward if you could not bang in my house that would be nice
You took nana to a bar?!
she suggested it
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